We’ve
been together for almost three years now and I wondered when he would propose
to me. Together we had so many memories kept in my heart. I remember when I got
caught by the blizzard and was stranded inside my stuck car on the woods where
no help arrived. I was so cold my whole body was so numb that I couldn’t even
move my hands to open the door of my Chevy. Robert came rushing through the
cruel snow and broke the glass that separated us. I was so enormously big that
time but he managed to carry me on his back and took me home; made a very salty
soup but we laughed about it...then we had a great sex. I remember when I got
home early from work and I saw Robert in the kitchen trying all his might to
cook me a nice dinner. The chicken soup he was cooking smelled so bad and the
meat was grilled excessively that it was palatable anymore. The oven with a
small pie in it was filled with smoke and was about to start a fire. I also
remember when I got sick with the flu that had struck the city, he took a leave
from his work and took care of me in the hospital until I got better and even
stayed at home for a week to look out for me even though his leave has already
been due. It caused him to be terminated from his work but he never felt regrets
about it but if ever did, he never showed it to me… I miss his loud cracks, his
goodnight hugs and kisses. I miss his handsome face that I used to see first
thing in the morning upon opening my eyes. I miss going with him to church
during Sunday masses and look for someone or something to laugh about. I miss
his great appetite for sex that had always satisfied me every time we do it. We
had a vivid imagination of the future: getting married, a dozen of kids, a
house, a business and trip to places we’ve never been before.Then we’ll grow old together, dreaming of counting each
other’s grey hair. Then our kids will marry and eventually give us
grandchildren. I can’t think of a happier dream than that of what we had…
Our
third anniversary came and we planned for a romantic dinner at our favourite
seafood restaurant. I waited for him thereto arrive from his business trip to
England to promote their business. I sat on the chair and waited for him
patiently as he promised he will come. He never missed any of our anniversary
celebrations so far so I sat there and made myself busy for the moment. I
wanted to be the most beautiful woman among the people inside the diner when he
arrives. I checked my face in the mirror, still stunningly beautiful. I can’t
stop those guys who were looking at me admiring my seductive looks. My new
velvet dress from Chanel added the points. The women passing at my candle-lit
floral table gave me looks with different meanings. Some may have envied me but
some stares never escaped my questioning eyes from being cursed by how prettier
I was than them. Robert always feels proud every time we walk at a crowded
street or go shopping. But sometimes I lose his patience because of the
hours-long I am spending trying to buy a pair of boots or a single dress to
wear at work. I consider it normal for us, women because we really need an
exquisite amount of time for shopping. Robert says it is just a waste of time.
Why try hard to fit the largest size of a shoe in your feet when there’s no
hope of actually fitting it to you? He has a point.
I
waited for so long for his arrival. I was wishing so desperate this would be
the day he propose marriage to me. I will accept it with no hesitation. For
hours I waited for Robert but he never came. I didn’t notice I have already
drunk the half of the champagne bottle served to me. I began to worry. What if
he won’t show up? What if he found a new love during his week-long stay in
England? What if he’d trash me like what he did to Helena? A lot of ‘what ifs’
were going out of my head and it made me shiver like was inside an elevator
made of ice. I finally took the courage to reach my mobile phone and dialled his
number but his cell was out of reach. I comforted and assured myself he would
be arriving as he promised. Maybe he dropped by his gallery studio to see how
it has been. It will soon open for exhibit and many of his friends and clients
were dying to see his magnificent works of art. He will soon be entering the
door in his black tux with three white roses on his hands. One, two, three,
four hours have passed and no face of Robert came. People come and go out of
the restaurant but I never saw him. I have emptied the bottle and my chest
began to rumble. Something wasn’t right…My phone ringed, it was an unknown
number. It was John, Robert’s co-worker on the other line delivering me the
most terrifying news I’ve ever heard. I could hardly digest the words that came
from John’s mouth as he retold me what happened. I ran out of the restaurant
and hurried towards St. Anne’s Hospital, the ten kilometres seemed ten miles
for me. I was crying thinking of Robert, this was so unexpected and very
tragic. The traffic made me growl in anger, I walked out of my car and ran as
fast as I could. I let out a loud scream as I saw Robert lying on the hospital
bed covered with blood. His face was unrecognisable because of the heavy amount
of blood that covered his face but I was sure it was him. He was wearing the
brown bead bracelet I made for him a long time ago. A part of his feet was missing and his suit
was tore apart revealing his hairy chest. All I see was blood…a lot blood. I
saw the white roses beside him covered with blood, some its petals had fallen
on the floor and next thing happened, blackness conquered me and I fell on the
floor. Robert died from a tragic accident on the day of our third anniversary…
Police
officers’ intrinsic report said he was last seen coming out of a jewelry shop holding
a bouquet of white flowers wearing a sweet smile on his face. As he was trying
to reach up for his car parked on the side of the road, a reckless ten-wheeler
truck driven by a drunk driver came rushing through the road and accidentally,
Robert and his car were crashed by the raging truck. I can’t think of any valid
reason why God had made this thing happened to me and Robert. Was it because I
stole Robert from my best friend Helena? Was it forbidden to be happy and stay
in the arms of the one you truly love? I can’t believe how ironic and cruel my
once happy and contented life turned into. Death took my beloved Robert and a
part of me also died with him…
The wind was so cold and the rain never stopped, this time
it rained harder raging through my veins. My long black dress now fitted so
tightly on my shivering body. I opened my arms wide and stared at the black
sky. Tears and the rain mixed together on my face. I looked down and from the
27th floor that I was standing, I see nothing that pure darkness.
Again, I closed my eyes and let darkness swallowed me as I was falling from the
building to face death with Robert still lingering in my head…
 | |
| When White Roses Turn Red by Angel Gambon |
xx the end xx
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