When White
Roses Turn Red
I lit a cigarette as the wind
came across the window giving me a slight chill on my pale body. The rain is
drizzling and it makes a disturbing noise at this depth of night. I can’t sleep;
the aroma of a decaf coffee invited me to grab the cup and took a sip of it.
What a lonely rainy night, a storm is obviously hitting the city and the streets
of Gloomsville are emptied. The people feel like prisoners of their own houses waiting
impatiently for the rain to stop so they could go out and embrace a whole new
day. It’s the third day of non-stop raining and I wish it wouldn’t stop. I want
to lock myself in my room and rot.
My reflection on the mirror
registers a tall woman wearing a black silky dress. It looked sexy and very
seductive on her petite body not to mention the long slender leg shown on the
right side slit of her dress. Her hair so untidy and light make up smudged her face making her even more seductive yet frail. I’m expecting to
hear a knock from my door where Robert would just be right outside waiting for me
to open and would surprise me with a bouquet of my favorite white roses and a
box of pizza from his mom’s restaurant. I stared at the door for a long moment…
how silly of me…he is not coming anymore…Robert is gone. Silence filled the darkroom, I still don’t have the strength to move to where I am standing and change this dress
which I wore at the funeral. Tears overflowed from my eyes down to my cheeks as
I stare myself in front of the mirror. Robert gave me this dress and proposed I should wear it on the day of his photo gallery’s grand opening three days from
now. How ironic and heartbreaking because I wore it on the day of his funeral. I miss my Rob…so
much that it hurts inside…
I lit
another stick and the smoke made me cough this time, I pushed myself outside my
apartment and walked towards the veranda. My body began to freeze in the cold as the
rain dripped and penetrated my whole body…staring blankly at the wide blackness
in front of me, I slowly closed my eyes…
It was
mid-September and I was walking on the busy street of Hummington when my friend
Helena called me up for a coffee at her place. I dropped my plan of going to
the supermarket to buy some stuff and took a detour towards Bordeaux Street and not
so far then I saw Helena waving at me with a stranger at her side. Helena
hurried towards me and gave me a warm hug for giving in to her invitation. She’s
my closest friend since high school and now that we finished college and even
started having our own works, we never forget to get in touch with each other
whenever time permits us. He introduced to me the guy beside her. “It’s great
to finally see you!”. He offered me his hands for a handshake, tiny white set
of teeth with a wholehearted smile. That was the very first time I ever laid my
eyes on Robert. I gave a meaningful look at Helena as we entered her house.
That day, I found out that my best friend and Robert have been dating for a
couple of weeks and the latter said he wanted to meet me because he was curious
about me. They were so sweet together and I felt happy for them especially for
my best friend but unconsciously, I feel a tiny searing pain from my chest as I
watched them together. I ignored it… Back
off, Gabriella!, I told myself because obviously, I was stirring my own feelings for him on the first day we met.
The next day, I received an e-mail from him telling me he got my e-mail address
from Helena. I replied to his mail so formally that I even forgot he was a friend,
too. The exchange of emails between me and Robert continued the next day and
then the next. He was even on my Outlook inbox at my office work. On and on went the
conversations until he finally managed to get my mobile number. We exchanged
calls and text messages and every time I receive one from him, I feel like I’m
at top of the world! But he is my best friend's boyfriend…anyway his messages to
me are just friendly thoughts and no signs that he was into me until he called
me one day and told me he was thinking maybe we should go out for some time—just
the two of us! I felt guilty for Helena cos I feel like I’m stealing her guy. I
dropped my prejudice and went out with him like it was just a friendly day out.
It was not even a date! We watched a movie and then took a walk to Central
Park. Our conversation that day became more intimate than usual; Robert
confessed that he was in love with me and that he wanted us to be together. For
one split of a second I wanted to grab him and hug him and kiss him then tell
him how I wanted him, too. How I love him so much. Robert was a charming and funny guy. He could
take away all your worries and replace it with a wide smile on your face. His
face is like of an angel, so innocent and kind-hearted and reserved a huge
obsession with painting. He loved painting pictures of different themes. He once dreamed
of having his own gallery shop where he could display all his masterpieces but
he died when he was about to achieve it…
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